he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
