Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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