Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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