Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
