Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
