where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
