Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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