Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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