Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize