I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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