yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Randomize