i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
there is glitter all over my balls
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
