So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
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