I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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