I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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