in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
