just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
