But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I miss vodka workout Fridays
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I AM VODKA MAN
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
