you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
