We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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