Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
