i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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