i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize