You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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