Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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