we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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