just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
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