Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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