i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
what day is it and did you see me today?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
