Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
