I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize
