Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
Swine flu. Run for my life!
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
My bed smells like the plague
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
