I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize