laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
