Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
