There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
