You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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