dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
