I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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