the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
