I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Randomize
