I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
