yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Randomize
