I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize