apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
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