we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
