So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
