she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize