Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
