i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
